When Someone We Love Is Afflicted with a Terminal Illness
当我们所爱之人患了绝症时
Goals
目标
• To grow in understanding the spiritual and emotional needs of those who are afflicted with lengthy, terminal illnesses.
慢慢理解那些患了长期绝症的人在灵魂上和精神上的需要。
• To learn how to help those who are suffering from terminal illnesses.
学会帮助那些被绝症折磨的人。
• To learn how to comfort both those suffering with terminal illnesses and their family members with the Word of God.
学会如何用上帝的话语安慰被绝症折磨的人，以及他们的家人。
Introduction
介绍
Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, a Swiss-born psychiatrist who has worked extensively with the dying, has observed that the terminally ill go through a series of stages as they come to grips with impending death. The following chart shows the five stages along with Scripture references related to those stages.
瑞典籍精神病学家Elizabeth Kübler-Ross对死亡展开了广泛研究，她发现在面临即将到来的死亡之前，绝症会经历一系列的阶段。如下列出了这五个阶段及相关的圣经参考经文。
KÜBLER-ROSS STAGES OF DEATH AND DYING
死亡和临终的KÜBLER-ROSS阶段
Denial and Isolation
拒绝和孤立
1 Kings 19:1-5
列王记上19:1-5
Romans 8:18-21
罗马书8:18-21
Anger
愤怒
Job 2:7-10
约伯记2:7-10
Romans 8:28
罗马书8:28
Bargaining with God
和上帝讨价还价
1 Samuel 1:10,11
撒母耳记上1:10-11
Romans 8:31,32
罗马书8:31-32
Depression
沮丧
Psalm 88:13-18
诗篇88:13-18
Romans 8:37-39
罗马书8:37-39
Acceptance
接受
2 Corinthians 4:7-15
哥林多后书4:7-15
Although these five stages describe with almost surprising accuracy the experiences of the majority of those struggling with terminal illnesses, not everyone goes through all the stages. Some may go from hearing the news that they are terminally ill to the acceptance stage. Others may repeat the cycle or portions of it as they hear more about their diseases. Since these grief stages are the common experience of the majority of those who are dying, we will use those stages as the framework for our lesson.
尽管这五个阶段所描述的与绝大多数身患绝症者所经历的惊人地一致，但并不是所有人都会经历所有五个阶段。有些人会从听到他们得了绝症的消息，直接跳到接受事实的阶段。还有些人当他们听到更多关于疾病的消息时，会重复整个周期或其中某些部分。由于这些悲伤的阶段是大部分面临死亡之人的普遍经历，所以我们将以这五个阶段作为我们本课的框架。
Life example
生活中的例子
Denial and Isolation
拒绝和孤立
Eunice, age 55, was often so exhausted she could hardly finish her daily chores. She had to stop to catch her breath while clearing the table; she had to hang on to furniture when she walked around the house. Thinking that she was just out of shape, she decided on a walking regimen. But after walking only one block, she became so dizzy and out of breath that she could hardly make it back home.
尤尼斯，55岁，她经常感到精疲力竭而无法做完家务事。擦桌子时她必须停下来歇口气；在房子里来回走动时她必须扶着家具。她想她可能只是身体状况不佳，因此她决定散步健身。但仅仅走了一个街区，她就变得头晕眼花且呼吸困难，甚至都回不了家。
A trip to the doctor brought bad news. She was suffering from congestive heart failure, emphysema, and kidney failure. Besides needing powerful medication, the doctor explained that she would no longer be able to live alone. At the very least, she would need round-the-clock care in her home. She might even need to move to an assisted-living facility.
医生告诉她一个坏消息。她得了充血性心脏衰竭，肺气肿和肾脏衰竭。除了需要强力的药物治疗，医生解释说她已经不能独自生活。如果坚持要住在自己的家里，那最起码的，她需要全天候的护理。她甚至需要搬到看护中心。
When Eunice called to break the news to her family, she showed no emotion. Though Eunice is not by nature a cold and distant person—others have called her their angel for the compassion she has shown for the sick—she spoke to her family in a very matter-of-fact way. There was no emotion in her voice. There were no tears. She asked for no help. She didn’t even ask for advice about how to make plans for her needed care.
当尤尼斯打电话告诉家人这个消息时，她没有半点情绪波动。尤尼斯不是一个性格冷淡和拒人于千里之外的人——她的家人都因为她对病人的同情而叫她天使——她以一种非常平淡的方式向她的家人说明了情况。她的声音里没有任何情绪。脸上也没有眼泪。她没有寻求帮助。她甚至没有对如何制定她所需要的看护计划寻求任何建议。
Reflections of faith
信心的反思
1. Eunice is in the first stage of death and dying—the denial and isolation stage. Why do you think people who react like Eunice refuse to accept a doctor’s diagnosis?
尤尼斯处在死亡和临终的第一阶段——拒绝和孤立阶段。你觉得为什么像尤尼斯这样的人会拒绝接受医生的诊断？
They are in a state of shock and don’t want to hear what the doctor says. Denial is a way of coping with painful news.
他们处在震惊的阶段而不想听医生所说的话，拒绝是对于令人痛苦的消息的一种应对方法。
2. This will be a challenging time for family members who want to help her. Why?
对于想要帮助她的家庭成员来说这将是一个艰难的时刻。为什么？
She will resist efforts to talk about her situation. That will frustrate attempts to make necessary plans for her care.
她会拒绝尝试谈论她的病情，那将阻碍为她制定所需看护计划的尝试。
3. When people are in a state of denial, they tend to isolate themselves. But they need family and friends around them. They need someone to listen to them. They need someone to talk to them. If Eunice was a member of your church and your friend, what would you say to her?
当人们处在拒绝的阶段时，他们倾向于把自己孤立起来。但他们需要家人和朋友在身边，他们需要有人倾听，他们需要与人交谈。如果尤尼斯是你教会的一员和你的朋友，你将对她说些什么？
It is important to be honest. We don’t want to pretend everything is normal. We need to talk about how death came into the world and how we are subject to death. Then we can remind her that Jesus conquered death.
坦诚相待十分重要，我们不想假装所有事情都一切正常，我们需要谈论死亡是如何来到世界，以及我们是如何受制于死亡的，然后我们可以提醒她耶稣已经战胜了死亡。
Light from the Word
经文之光
Read 1 Kings 19:1-5.
阅读列王记上19:1-5。
1. Elijah heard the news that his life was threatened by the queen. Eunice found out that she was dying from a terminal disease. Compare the ways they reacted to the news. 以利亚听说王后威胁要杀他的消息。尤尼斯发现她将死于绝症。将他们两人知道这事时的反应作比较。
They both were stunned. Elijah had expected victory for those who were faithful to God. Eunice had expected to continue living a full and meaningful life. For both, this represented a dramatic turnabout. Defeat loomed before them. Both of them were afraid and wanted to be alone.
他们都很震惊。以利亚本指望那些忠于上帝的人得胜；尤尼斯本指望继续过一个丰富而有意义的生活。对于他们两者来说，这都表现了一个戏剧性的转折。失败在前方步步逼近，他们两人都很害怕，都想自己独处。
2. Fear, denial, and the desire to be alone are often part of the first stage of grieving. Elijah’s fear was immediate. Jezebel had threatened his life. He fled to the desert and then lay down and asked God to take his life.
恐惧、拒绝和想要独处的想法通常是悲伤的第一阶段的一部分。以利亚的恐惧是立即发生的。耶洗别威胁到了他的性命。他逃到沙漠中，然后躺下求上帝取走他的性命。
How might fear show itself in the actions of people dying of terminal illnesses?
即将死于绝症的人如何变现他们的恐惧？
They might spend thousands of dollars trying questionable cures, no matter how suspect the claims for the product might be. Or they might threaten to commit or actually commit suicide. Some might try to drown their fears with alcohol or drugs. Others might put on a pretense of bravery and live wild lives.
他们也许会花上千美元尝试各种不可靠的治疗方法，不论该产品疗效的声明有多可疑；或者他们可能威胁要自杀或已尝试自杀；有些人可能会试着用酒精或毒品来麻痹自己的恐惧；另一些人可能以勇敢伪装自己，过狂放不羁的生活。
3. Lack of trust in God often contributes to the fear we feel when we have received disturbing news. Explain how lack of trust contributed to the fear exhibited by both Elijah and Eunice.
当我们得到令人不安的消息之时，缺乏对上帝的信任通常是我们感到恐惧的原因。解释缺乏信心是如何分别导致以利亚和尤尼斯表现其恐惧的？
Elijah trusted God in the great confrontation with the priests of Baal. His trust seemed to weaken when he saw the apparent success turn into apparent failure. He didn’t seem to trust that God could rescue him or that the Holy Spirit would keep some fellow Israelites faithful. His problem seemed to be that he was looking more at the faithlessness of man, rather than the faithfulness of God. Eunice seemed to lack trust that God would be with her and that he had her welfare in mind.
以利亚在大战巴力的祭司时是信靠上帝的，但当他看到明显的胜利转变为明显的失败时，他的信心似乎减弱了。他似乎不相信上帝会搭救他，或圣灵会保守一部分以色列人有信心。他的问题似乎在于过多看到人的不信实，而看不到上帝的信实。尤尼斯似乎对于上帝会与她同在并关心她的福祉缺乏信心。
4. Elijah didn’t seem to think he deserved what was happening. That is an expression of self-righteousness. Explain why a feeling of self-righteousness might be one reason for Eunice’s apparent denial of impending death.
以利亚似乎认为将要发生的事不是他所应得的。那是他自以为义的一种表现。解释为什么自以为义可能是尤尼斯明显拒绝即将面临之死亡的一个原因。
When trouble comes, we often forget the many blessings God has given us. The sinful nature tries to tell us that, because of our faith or the good lives we have lived, God owes us better than this. We don’t want to accept the trouble that faces us. That could be the case with Eunice.
当困难来袭，我们常常忘记上帝给予我们的诸多祝福。罪性试图告诉我们，因为我们的信心或过有好行为的生活，上帝理应给我们更好的，我们不想接受所面临的困难。尤尼斯可能就是这种情况。
Fear, denial, and the desire to be alone are emotions that often overwhelm people shortly after hearing that they may not have long to live. Those are normal emotions, but they are not the best way to deal with troubling news.
当人们知道自己有可能活不长的时候，常常很快就被恐惧、拒绝和想要独处的情绪淹没。这些都是很正常的情绪，但并不是解决坏消息的最好方法。
Elijah prayed for death. Likewise, a person afflicted with a terminal illness may often pray for a quick death or may even be tempted to take his or her own life.
以利亚为死亡祷告。同样地，身患绝症的人也常常祷告希望快点儿死，甚至忍不住结束自己的生命。
5. Romans 8:18-21 tells us that all creation waits for the day when every heart will be revealed (judgment day). On that day, creation will be released from bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom enjoyed by the children of God. How might you use these words to help and comfort Eunice as she deals with the doctor’s diagnosis?
罗马书8:18-21告诉我们，受造之物切望等候神的众子显出来（审判日）。在那一天，受造之物将脱离败坏的辖制，得享上帝子女荣耀的自由。你如何运用这些经文来帮助尤尼斯正确地对待医生的诊断。
We could remind her that in the midst of death, there is life and hope and joy and peace because of Jesus. Though there is frustration, shock, and fear now, she is still a child of God. Through Baptism she was made God’s own. Through Baptism, Jesus’ sacrifice was made her own. Therefore, glorious freedom is hers.
我们可以提醒她因着耶稣，在死亡之中有着生命、希望、喜乐和平安。尽管现在会有沮丧、震惊和恐惧，她仍然是上帝的儿女。藉着洗礼她已属于上帝；藉着洗礼，耶稣献祭使她属于耶稣。因而，荣耀的自由是属于她的。
6. Read Romans 8:26,27. Sometimes the burden of our hearts is so great that we don’t know what to pray for or how to pray. The Holy Spirit intercedes for us. What comfort could Eunice find in those words?
阅读罗马书8:26-27。有时候我们心里的负担过于沉重，以至于我们不知道祷告什么或如何祷告。圣灵会替我们祈求。尤尼斯能从这些经文中找到怎样的安慰？
God loves her, and the Holy Spirit is praying for what is best for her. We can’t help but be thankful, especially when we think of the sins that separated us from God. Through Christ’s sacrifice, that wall of separation is broken down.
上帝爱她，圣灵也为着她最大的益处而祷告。特别是当我们想到罪将我们与上帝隔绝，我们无能为力但为此感恩，感恩尽管如此藉着基督的献祭，这隔绝之墙已经倒塌。
Life example
生活中的例子
Anger
愤怒
Eunice was very angry with her doctors because they weren’t helping her. (She switched doctors twice.) She did get some help through a home health-care organization, but that didn’t work out either. The caregivers kept quitting because Eunice was so bitter and angry and so hard to please.
尤尼斯对她的医生感到非常气愤，因为他们不能帮助她。（她已经换了两次医生了）。她确实从一个家庭医疗保健机构得到过一些帮助，但那也没解决她的问题。尤尼斯十分刻薄和愤怒，并且难以取悦，因此她的护理人员先后都辞职了。
Reflections of faith
信心的反思
Why would it be very difficult for you to help Eunice as she struggles through this stage of dying?
对你来说帮助尤尼斯熬过临终的这个阶段为什么如此困难？
In her anger, she is ready to fire everyone, including her friends and God.
在她的愤怒中，她准备解雇所有人，包括她的朋友和上帝。
Light from the Word
经文之光
Read Job 2:7-10.
阅读约伯记2:7-10节。
1. The story of Job focuses on his spiritual struggle, but his wife also lost her children and her wealth. How is Job’s wife similar to Eunice?
约伯的故事着重在他属灵的争战上，但他的妻子也失去了她的孩子和财产。约伯的妻子和尤尼斯有什么相似的地方？
They were both angry with God.
他们都对上帝感到愤怒。
2. Job and his wife went through a serious spiritual struggle as their lives seemed to fall apart. As depressing as this struggle might seem, Eunice might be encouraged as she studies these words. In what way?
约伯和他的妻子经历了一场严酷的属灵争战，因为他们的生活似乎分崩离析了。尤尼斯的争战看起来似乎十分令人沮丧，这些经文可能会鼓励她，以何种方式呢？
We live in a sinful world. Others have fallen into despair too when they experienced the destructive effects of sin. Yet God is faithful. If we remember all the good things he has done for us, we can persevere, even in pain and suffering.
我们生活在一个罪恶的世界中，当其他人感受到罪毁灭性的影响时，他们也会陷入绝望当中。然而上帝是信实的，如果我们记得他为我们做的所有美好事情，即便是在痛苦和煎熬中，我们也能坚持下来。
3. It is relatively easy to recognize the truth expressed in Romans 8:28 when our troubles are small. But when death is approaching, we may have trouble comprehending the good that God is working in our lives. What can we point to when a person is struggling with a terminal illness?
当我们的困难较小时，我们能相对容易地理解罗马书8:28所表达的真理。但当死亡来临之际，我们也许很难理解上帝在我们的生活中所做的是为了我们的益处。当一个人与绝症作斗争时，我们可以从哪个角度来剖析这节经文？
God has our eternal good in mind, though we can’t always see how he works for that good. We can’t claim to speak for God and to know exactly what he intends to accomplish through the illness, but we can point to some blessings that he may bring through our illness. For example, a terminal illness provides time during which a person can become prepared, through Word and sacrament, to be with God. A terminal illness encourages a person to search God’s Word, in which he reminds us of his special love for us and his promise not to forsake us. It points us to Jesus as proof of that love. When a person expresses anger, we can witness to the fact that God does not bring evil. He may permit evil, but always for our good.
尽管我们并不总能看到上帝如何为我们的益处做工，上帝是关心我们永恒的益处的。尽管我们不能声称为上帝代言，并明确知道他想要通过疾病完成什么，但我们可以指出他通过我们的疾病所带来的祝福。例如，绝症提供了一段时间，在这段时间里某人可以变得有准备，藉着圣道和圣礼与上帝同在；绝症鼓励某人寻求上帝的话语，通过这些话语他提醒我们，他对我们特别的爱和应许不离弃我们；它向我们指明耶稣就是那爱的证明。当某人表达愤怒时，我们可以见证上帝并没有带来恶的事实，他可能允许恶出现，但永远是为着我们的益处。
Breakout/discussion
分组/讨论
1. It often happens that family members and friends go through some of the same stages of grief as a person who is terminally ill. Why do you think that is the case?
当一个人得了绝症时，经常出现这样的情况：其家庭成员或朋友经历某些相同的悲伤阶段。你觉得为什么会这样？
It hurts to see a friend or family member grow weak, knowing that our loved one will soon leave us.
看到一个朋友或家庭成员变得虚弱，得知我们所爱的人将离开我们，会让我们难过。
2. What kinds of relationship problems might develop if Eunice and you (a friend or family member) are each at different stages in the grieving process?
如果尤尼斯和你（你是她的朋友或家庭成员）各自处在悲伤过程的不同阶段，你们的关系有可能产生什么问题？
At the very least, we won’t be very helpful as she progresses through the stages of grieving. For example, if we are in the denial stage and she is dealing with anger or depression, we will probably avoid talking about her illness. There is also a possibility we could delay her progress through the stages. If we are angry and she is depressed, our anger may reinforce her depression.
至少明确一点，就是在她经历悲伤的不同阶段时我们不会起到很大帮助。例如，当我们处在拒绝阶段而她正应对愤怒或沮丧时，我们可能会避免谈论她的疾病，我们也可能延迟她通过这些阶段的时间。如果我们愤怒而她很沮丧，我们的怒气可能会加重她的沮丧情绪。
Life example
生活中的例子
Bargaining with God
与上帝做交易
Eunice remains terribly frustrated. She tells you that she is praying and praying that God will make her healthy again. She has promised God that if he heals her, she will give the money she would have spent on her hospital care to the WELS Scholarship Fund. That will help future pastors and teachers get an education so that they can be sent out to preach God’s Word. “Still,” she tells you, “I am not getting healthy.”
尤尼斯仍然非常失望。她告诉你她持续地祷告祈求上帝让她重新好起来。她承诺如果上帝医治她，她将把她本来要花的医疗费捐给教会的奖学金基金。那将会用来帮助教育未来的牧师和教师，使他们出去传讲上帝的话语。“什么都没变”，她告诉你，“我还是没好起来”。
Reflections of faith
信心的反思
1. The bargaining stage isn’t healthy. The person’s entire thinking process is skewed. What false assumptions might lead people to think they can bargain with God?
做交易这个阶段并不健康。因为整个人的思考过程都是歪曲的。哪些错误的设想会导致人们认为他们能与上帝做交易？
Bargaining can so easily turn into an attempt to bribe God. God cannot be bribed. Also, underlying the belief that we can bargain with God is a work-righteous attitude that we can earn this blessing. It also displays an arrogant attitude that we know, better than God does, what is best for us.
做交易的行为很容易变成试图收买上帝的做法，上帝是无法被收买的。认为我们可以与上帝做交易的想法，其根源是一种靠行为称义的态度，觉得我们可以赚取这祝福。它同样显示了一种高傲的态度，认为我们比上帝更加知道，什么对我们是最好的。
2. How would you respond to Eunice as she complains that her bargaining has gotten her nowhere?
当尤尼斯抱怨她与上帝的交易毫无进展时，你应该如何回应她？
We need to lead her to trust in God’s love and mercy, which is always unconditional. The best place to start is her sin and God’s forgiveness. She could offer nothing that would earn forgiveness; yet God has dealt with her in mercy by sending Jesus to die for her. In every aspect of her life, he still deals with her in his mercy, because she is a child of God by God’s grace through Christ.
我们需要引导她相信上帝的爱和怜悯永远是无条件的。最好以她的罪和上帝的原谅作为开端，她无论做什么都不能赚得上帝的原谅；然而上帝在怜悯之中，通过差派耶稣为她而死，完成了与她的交易。在她生活中的每个方面，上帝仍然在怜悯之中与她交易，因为藉着基督，她因上帝的恩典成为了上帝的儿女。
Light from the Word
经文之光
1 . Read 1 Samuel 1:10,11. Hannah wanted a son. At first it may appear that she was bargaining with God, but notice that she was making a vow. She didn’t offer the vow as a strategy to incline God to answer her request—to try to change God’s will toward her. She was stating what she would do out of thanks for this marvelous gift. What might you point to in the story of Hannah that might encourage Eunice
阅读撒母耳记上1:10-11。哈拿想要一个儿子。起初看起来她好像是在与上帝做交易，但注意她其实是发了一个誓。她并没有把誓言作为一个策略，让上帝倾向于答应她的要求——试图改变上帝对她的旨意。而是列出她将以什么行为来感谢上帝如此奇妙的恩赐。你认为哈拿的故事中有哪些地方能够鼓励尤尼斯？
Hannah poured out her heart to God in prayer. God showed his compassion and his power. (We want to be careful that we don’t imply that God will necessarily answer her prayer just the way she wants.) People tend to hear what they want to hear, so we don’t want to make statements about what God will do in answer to her prayer. We don’t know what God intends to do in the future, but we do have proof of his compassion and power. We can assure her that God will be merciful to her.
哈拿在祷告中向上帝倾吐心声，上帝展现了他的同情和大能，（我们要注意并不是表明，上帝一定会以她想要的方式回应她的祷告。）人们倾向于去听他们想听的事，因此我们不想做出陈述，说上帝将做什么来回应她祷告。我们不知道上帝准备在将来做什么，但我们确有上帝怜悯和大能的证据，我们能够向她保证，上帝将会怜悯她。
2. Read Romans 8:31,32. What proves God’s love and compassion for Eunice?
阅读罗马书8:31-32。什么证明了上帝对尤尼斯的爱和怜悯？
The proof of his love for her is the fact that he sent Jesus to be her Savior.
上帝对她爱的证明，就是上帝差派耶稣成为了她的救主。
3. God will not automatically give Eunice everything she asks for, the way she wants it. However, what can Eunice know about God’s answer to her prayers?
上帝不会自然而然地按照尤尼斯想要的方式给尤尼斯她想要的一切。然而，关于上帝对她祷告的回应，尤尼斯能够知道些什么？
God will answer her prayer according to his love. His answer will be what is best for her.
上帝将以他的爱来回应尤尼斯的祷告。他的回应对于尤尼斯来说将是最好的。
4. In 2 Corinthians 12:7-10, we read that Paul too prayed that God would take away some physical problem that troubled him. Review God’s answer to Paul’s prayer. What did it mean?
在哥林多后书12:7-10中，我们读到保罗也曾向上帝祷告解决困扰他身体健康的问题。回顾上帝对保罗祷告的回应。那是什么意思？
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” God wanted Paul to know that more important than physical healing was the love God had shown by calling him to faith and giving him the privilege of serving as his missionary. Besides, God used Paul’s physical weakness to underscore his own strength. The spread of the gospel and the growth of the church were not the results of Paul’s prowess but were due to the power of God working through the Word and sacraments. So God used Paul’s weakness to further his kingdom work.
“我的恩典够你用的，因为我的能力是在人的软弱上显得完全。”上帝想让保罗知道，比身体上的医治更重要的，是上帝通过呼召他信主并给予他作为传道人服侍的荣耀，而向他展现的爱。另外，上帝用保罗身体上的弱点来强调上帝自己的力量，福音的传播和教会的增长并不是保罗能力，而是因为上帝的大能藉着圣道和圣礼做工。因此，上帝用保罗的弱点来扩展上帝国度的工作。
5. As you read about Paul’s struggle concerning his affliction, point to several truths that would be helpful to Eunice.
我们读到保罗陷入苦难时的挣扎，从中指出一些能够帮助尤尼斯的真理。
“No” is sometimes God’s answer to our prayers. And when his answer is no, we can be sure it is the best answer for us. He knows the future. Eunice can trust his goodness though she may not know how God is using her illness for the good of his kingdom.
“不”有时候是上帝对我们祷告的回应。并且，当他的回应是“不”时，我们能肯定这是对我们最好的回应，上帝知道将来的事。尽管尤尼斯不知道上帝如何为着他国度的益处，来利用尤尼斯的疾病，但尤尼斯可以相信他是良善的。
Life example
生活中的例子
Depression
抑郁
Bargaining with God has failed and Eunice knows it, so she gives up. Deep in self-pity, she sees no hope for her future. Since she doesn’t sleep well, she is listless and lies around all day. She forgets things. She neglects her grooming.
尤尼斯知道与上帝的交易失败了，因此她放弃了。她陷入深深的自怜中，觉得未来没有希望了。因为她睡不好觉，所以她无精打采，整日无所事事。她健忘，也不修边幅。
Reflections of faith
信心的反思
1. Depressed people often focus on the wrong things. What is the focus of Eunice’s attention? What should she be focusing on?
抑郁的人往往把注意力集中在错误的事情上。尤尼斯把注意力集中在哪里？她应该集中在哪里？
She is focusing on herself. The result is self-pity, because what she sees is not what she wants to see. She needs encouragement to focus on Christ and what Christ has done for her.
她把注意力集中在她自己身上，结果就是顾影自怜，因为她看到的并不是她想看到的，她需要接受鼓励来将注意力集中到基督，和基督为她做了什么上面。
2. Counselors urge family members to monitor a depressed person’s moods carefully. Why?
心里咨询师强烈要求抑郁之人的家庭成员仔细而密切注视其情绪。为什么？
Counselors want family members to be especially sensitive to the possibility of suicide.
心理咨询师希望其家庭成员对其自杀的可能性特别敏感。
Light from the Word
经文之光
1. In many ways, the thoughts expressed in Psalm 88:13-18 reflect the thoughts of a depressed person. Using this psalm as a guide, describe some of the feelings Eunice might likely be feeling.
在很多方面，诗篇88:13-18中表达的思想反映了一个抑郁之人的想法。用该诗篇经文作为引导，描述尤尼斯可能有哪些感受。
Rejection by God. Fear of death. Hopelessness. Helplessness. Despair. She likely feels that God is angry with her and that she is all alone in her pain. She will feel overwhelmed, and even though we are trying to help her, she will feel that there is no one to help her and that none of her friends understand what she is going through.
被上帝拒绝、害怕死亡、无望、无助、绝望。她可能感到上帝生她的气，她只能独自承受痛苦，她会不知所措，尽管我们仍尝试帮助她，她仍会觉得没有人帮她，也没有一个朋友明白她所经历的。
2. How might you use this psalm as you counsel Eunice?
你如何用该诗篇经文来劝告尤尼斯？
Reading the psalm may very well benefit us the most. It will help us understand her feelings of despair. But it can also be helpful for her by showing her that others have felt the same way she does. It is important that we listen, listen, listen. Then we can speak about objective justification. Jesus is the Savior of all the world. Therefore, Eunice has not been left out. Jesus is her Savior also.
阅读该诗篇也许对我们最有益，它将帮助我们明白尤尼斯绝望的感受，但也能帮助尤尼斯，告诉她其他人也有与她相同的感受。重要的是我们要倾听，倾听，倾听，然后我们才能传讲客观称义的道理。耶稣是整个世界的救主，因此，尤尼斯并没有被排除在外，耶稣也是她的救主。
3. When Paul wrote the book of Romans, he and many other Christians were suffering because of their faith. Romans 8:37-39 is a passage that offers comfort, no matter what kind of suffering people may be enduring. List all the comforting thoughts in this passage that might apply to Eunice.
当保罗写罗马书的时候，他和其他很多基督徒都在因他们的信仰而遭受折磨。罗马书8:37-39的经文给那些遭受折磨的人们提供了安慰。列出该段经文中所有能应用到尤尼斯身上的安慰信息。
We are conquerors—even more than conquerors. God loves us in Christ, and nothing can separate us from Christ’s love. Not even all of Satan’s powers can separate us from Christ.
我们是胜利者——更甚于胜利者，上帝在基督里爱我们，什么都不能叫我们与基督的爱隔绝，即便是撒旦所有的能力，也不能叫我们与基督隔绝。
Life example
生活中的例子
Acceptance
接受
As time passes, Eunice begins to accept the fact that she is going to die. She trusts that her Savior loves her and that she will be in heaven. When she sees a tear in your eye as you visit with her, she encourages you, “Why are you crying? God is taking me to heaven to be with my Jesus. I am not sad. I am happy.”
随着时光的流逝，尤尼斯已经开始接受她即将死亡的事实。她相信她的救主爱她并且她将要去天堂。当她看见你前来探望时你眼中噙着泪水，她鼓励你说：“你为什哭呢？上帝要带我去天堂同耶稣在一起。我一点也不伤心。我很高兴。”
Reflections of faith
信心的反思
Is your work of encouraging finished? Explain.
你鼓励的工作完成了吗？解释一下。
No. We thank the Lord with her, but we keep encouraging her. Satan will still try to drive her to despair. She will have relapses. We will need to keep encouraging, keep listening, and keep speaking God’s Word to her.
没有。我们感谢主与她同在，但我们仍鼓励她。撒旦仍会尝试使她感到绝望，她的情绪也会反复，我们需要持续鼓励她，持续倾听，持续向她传讲上帝的话语。
Light from the Word
经文之光
1. In 2 Corinthians 4:7-15, God reminds us that he uses frail, ordinary human vessels to convey his precious gospel. He follows with a description of the hope every Christian has. Summarize for Eunice the hope that is hers.
在哥林多后书4:7-15，上帝提醒我们他用脆弱的普通人作为容器来传达他珍贵的福音。接着又描述每个基督徒都有的盼望。为尤尼斯总结她的盼望是什么。
Paul illustrates the preserving power of God as it shows itself in the protection of his “jars of clay.” Because of Jesus’ love, we will not be defeated. We may be struck with troubles and persecution, but we are not crushed. In the eyes of others, our lives may give the appearance of weakness and death, but through the eyes of faith, we see victorious life in Christ. We have the wonderful assurance that we will rise from the dead to eternal life.
保罗描述了上帝保护的大能，正如同它在保护上帝的“瓦器”上显现出来一般。因着耶稣的爱，我们将不会被打败，我们可能被困难和逼迫所打击，但确保不会被压碎。在其他人眼中，我们的生命可能看起来遍布虚弱与死亡，但在充满信心的眼里，我们看见在基督里得胜的生命，我们拥有宝贵的确据，那就是我们将从死里复活得永生 。
2. What does this passage say about the purpose of human suffering?
这篇经文中说人类苦难的目的是什么？
Paul recognized that his suffering was a reflection of the suffering and death that Jesus endured. Eunice’s impending death doesn’t have the same cause, but in both cases the purpose is that the life of Jesus may be shown through their lives.
保罗认识到他的苦难是耶稣所经受的苦难和死亡的反映；尤尼斯即将面临的死亡与其原因不同，但两者的目的，都是耶稣的生命能够过通过他们的生命而显现出来。
3. How might Eunice’s suffering be of benefit to others?
尤尼斯的苦难如何对其他人有益处？
Though she may or may not recognize this during her lifetime, others may benefit from her suffering as they see her faith in her loving Savior Jesus Christ.
尽管尤尼斯也许能够或不能在她的一生中认识到这点，但其他人也许能够从她的苦难中受益，因为他们在她慈爱的救主耶稣基督身上看到了她的信心。
Let’s think about the lesson
让我们思考这一课
At each stage in the grieving process, Eunice has needed slightly different help. What does that tell you about
在悲伤过程的每个阶段，尤尼斯都需要稍微不同的帮助。这告诉我们关于如下需要的什么？
• the need to listen to what Eunice is saying before trying to help?
在尝试帮助尤尼斯前倾听她诉说的需要。
Unless we listen to her carefully, she will know that we don’t really understand her struggle. We also might miss opportunities to offer her appropriate comfort from God’s Word.
除非我们仔细倾听她的话，否则她认为我们并不真正明白她的挣扎。我们也可能失去机会，给她从上帝话语而来的真正的安慰。
• the need to be persistent in offering to help Eunice?
坚持不断向尤尼斯提供帮助的需要。
Never-ending love is demanded of us. God will bless us. He will bless his Word as we speak it to her.
永无止境的爱是对我们的要求，上帝将祝福我们，当我们向尤尼斯传讲上帝的话语时，他将祝福这话语。
Perhaps you are already helping someone who is suffering from a terminal illness. If not, ask your pastor to offer your assistance to someone in your church who needs loving encouragement as he or she struggles with a terminal illness.
也许你已经在帮助某个身患绝症的人。如果没有，问问你的牧师，在教会中是否有与绝症作斗争的人需要你提供帮助并给他/她爱的鼓励。