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哥林多前书：13:4-7: 4爱是恒久忍耐，又有恩慈；爱是不嫉妒，爱是不自夸，不张狂，5不作害羞的事，不求自己的益处，不轻易发怒，不计算人的恶，6不喜欢不义，只喜欢真理； 7凡事包容，凡事相信，凡事盼望，凡事忍耐。
“爱是不嫉妒，爱是不自夸，不张狂”，我们可以把这三句话分开来看，也可以把它们当成一句话来看，因为这三句话表达了同一个主题。什么主题呢？“都是关于我自己。”
爱是不嫉妒，嫉妒实际上就是觊觎，意思是我们强烈渴望拥有别人的东西。你是否注意到，当你想拥有你邻舍的东西，你就不再喜欢你的邻舍，因为他有的东西你没有。那么如果你不喜欢你的邻舍，你肯定也就不爱他们，这也会体现在你的行为上。你会说些贬损的话来贬低他，只因为他拥有你渴望获得的东西。
爱是不自夸。下次当你听到有人吹嘘自己的时候，观察一下周围人脸上的表情。或者体会一下你自己对那个人的感受。你会不太开心，不太喜欢那个人，你知道为什么吗？因为那个人通过自夸抬高自己，会让你为自己感到难过。人们浏览朋友圈，看到那些享受美好假期、充满笑脸的人，他们会感到沮丧，因为他们希望自己也能和那些人一样。自夸会让你周围的人感到难过。
傲慢也是如此。和合本把这个词翻译成“张狂。”在希腊文原文中，它的字面意思是通过吹气让东西鼓起来。在中文里我们也使用类似的表达，，“他总是自我膨胀”。与其讲述你自己的故事，不如听听邻居的故事，不是更好吗?建议你以后可以试试这样做，在对话中不要只谈论你自己，不断询问对方的情况，你就会发现对方会全身心投入进来。因为你的关心，他们感受到被尊重。而这就是爱。
和以上这三点的相反的就是谦卑。C.S. 刘易斯说过：谦卑不是轻看自己，而是少考虑想自己。谦卑意味着我越过自己，优先看到我的邻舍。耶稣正是这样做的。保罗在腓立比书2章中提到，我们当以耶稣的心为心，他没有为自己考虑，而是为我们着想。耶稣藉着他的谦卑虚己，才能拯救我们。我们无法用我们的谦卑拯救我们的邻舍，但我们至少会因为谦卑而获得机会，和他们谈论耶稣。而这就是爱。
祷告：主耶稣，当你从高天下来拯救我们的时候，你想到了我。请赐给我谦卑的心，让我少为自己着想，更多地关注我邻舍的需求。阿们。
1 Corinthians 13: 4 Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not envy. It does not brag. It is not arrogant. 5 It does not behave indecently. It is not selfish. It is not irritable. It does not keep a record of wrongs. 6 It does not rejoice over unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (EHV)
We could take these three separately, or we can take them as one because they have the same theme. What is that theme? “It’s all about me.” To envy is the same is coveting, and it means that we want what someone else has. Have you ever noticed that when you want something your neighbor has, you don’t LIKE your neighbor because he has it and you don’t? Well, if you don’t like them, then you certainly don’t love them, and it will show in your actions as well. You will probably say something derogatory to put that person down, just because he has what you wish you had.
Love does not brag, either. The next time you hear someone boasting about himself, just check out the expressions of the people around you. Or check out your own feelings towards that person. You don’t like them much, do you? Do you know why? Because by elevating himself, that person makes you feel bad about yourself. People who surf Facebook and see all those great vacations and smiling faces feel depressed, because they wish they were in your shoes. Bragging makes people around you feel bad.
So does arrogance. The NIV translates the word as “proud.” In Greek, it literally means to puff yourself up. We use the same expression in English. “He has a self-inflated opinion of himself.” Instead of telling stories about yourself, wouldn’t it be better to hear stories about your neighbor? Try that out sometime. In a conversation, say nothing about yourself. Just ask about the other person, and see how engaged that person becomes. They are honored that you care about them! And that’s love.
The opposite of the above is called humility. C.S.Lewis said that humility is not thinking LESS of yourself, but thinking of yourself LESS. Humility means I look beyond myself and see my neighbor first. It’s what Jesus did for us. Paul says in Philippians 2 that our attitude should be the same as Jesus’, who did not think of himself but of us. He became nothing, a servant, so that he could rescue us from our sins. Through his humility, Jesus saved us. We can’t save our neighbor through our humility, but at least we will earn the right to tell them about Jesus. And that is love.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, you thought of me when you came down to earth to save us. Give me a humble spirit that thinks of myself less and pays attention to the needs of my neighbor. Amen.