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37耶稣回来，见他们睡着了，就对彼得说：“西门，你睡觉吗？不能警醒片时吗？38总要警醒祷告，免得入了迷惑。你们心灵固然愿意，肉体却软弱了。”39耶稣又去祷告，说的话还是与先前一样，40又来，见他们睡着了，因为他们的眼睛甚是困倦，他们也不知道怎么回答。41第三次来对他们说：“现在你们仍然睡觉安歇吧！（“吧！”或作“吗？”）够了，时候到了。看哪，人子被卖在罪人手里了。42起来，我们走吧！看哪，那卖我的人近了。”
马可如实记录了彼得对这段经历的回忆。彼得刚才还在自夸，说他永远不会离弃耶稣，但当耶稣祷告时，他的眼睛却睁不开了。耶稣很好的解释了原因，他说:“心灵固然愿意，肉体却软弱了。”
为什么我的灵修生活如此艰难?我聚会时一开始听讲道就会走神。我一念主祷文就不知去想什么其他事了。我可以在两天的时间里，用五六个小时把一本推理小说从头到尾读完，但我读《圣经》时却没有同样的热情。以赛亚书在我的圣经里只有110页，可是为什么让我一口气读完就这么难呢?晚上我躺下睡觉，还没等我做完一个简短的祷告，我就睡着了。
耶稣解释了我在灵修生活中软弱的原因，原因很见到。心灵固然愿意，肉体却软弱了。因为我的罪性，我愿意的善，我不去作;我不愿意的恶，我倒去作。然而，今天我有一点是感到高兴的，因为我的灵里愿意。我里面的新人并没有放弃，而是继续的祷告，读经，听讲道。我从上次的讲道中有一些得着。我在今天的灵修经文里找到了盼望，尽管这些经文也让我审视自己灵修生活的弱点。我的祷告或许软弱，但却因耶稣的缘故蒙垂听，蒙应允。圣灵仍天天在我里面作工，叫我的灵愿意。
祷告:主耶稣啊，我相信，但我信不足，求你帮助我克服我的不信。求你借着你的话语向我说话，并赐给我愿意灵修和祷告的灵，使我可以每天与你一同儆醒祷告。阿们。
Mark 14:37-42: Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Couldn’t you keep watch for one hour? 38 Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” 39 Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. 40 When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him. 41 Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is delivered into the hands of sinners. 42 Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!” (NIV)
Do you see Peter’s recollection of this story in Mark’s telling of it? Peter, who bragged that he would never forsake Jesus, could not keep his eyes open while Jesus prayed. Jesus explains it well when he says, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
Why is my devotional life so hard? I cannot sit through an entire sermon without letting my mind wander. I can hardly pray through the Lord’s Prayer without letting my mind wander. I can read a mystery novel from cover to cover in five or six hours in the course of two days, but I cannot read my Bible with the same passion. Isaiah is only 110 pages long in the Bible that sits next to me. Why would it be so difficult for me to read that in one sitting? I lay my head down to sleep at night and can hardly make it through a simple prayer without falling asleep.
Jesus explains the why of my weak devotional life very simply. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Because of my sinful nature, the good I want to do I don’t do, and the evil I don’t want to do, I keep on doing. Yet, and in this I rejoice today, the spirit is willing. The new person inside of me does not quit, but keeps muddling along with prayer and reading my Bible and listening to sermons. I got something out of that sermon last night. I found hope in the words above, even though they made me examine the weakness of my devotional life. My prayers, weak as they may be, are still heard and answered for Jesus’ sake. The Holy Spirit is still working in me day by day so that my spirit is willing.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, I do believe. Help me overcome my unbelief. Speak to me through your Word and give me a spirit of devotion and prayer, so that I may watch and pray with you daily. Amen.